The MummyShip

Of all the ships I’ve had to sail…the MummyShip is the hardest.

The last three decades of my life have brought forth many ‘ships’. Friendships, relationships, partnerships and even hardships. Recently I’ve ventured on a new journey as someone’s Mummy, which I’ve called ‘The MummyShip’.

MummyShip: noun

The way in which a mother and child(ren) are related.

When I found out I was expecting I thought of all the things I would need to do to prepare for baby’s arrival; purchase clothes and nursery tools, attend antenatal classes, research foods to avoid and foods to eat and more. You only have to Google ‘I’m having a baby…what to expect’ to be presented with an endless list of ‘essentials’ and ‘must haves’. Progressing into the tenth month, I felt 80% prepared. But what I hadn’t prepared myself for was the emotional and mental side of motherhood. Becoming a mother has completely flipped my reality, both in good and not so good ways.

Largely, the thing I struggle with the most is getting out and about with a newborn. The physical side of getting baby ready, packing endless tools and ‘just in case’ items is one thing on its own. But, for me the anxiety I feel about being outside and not being able to control all the variables that may come at me is what grips me. I constantly worry…

• …what if baby has a blow out and I can’t find a clean, accessible and warm place to change them?
• …what if baby keeps crying and crying? How will I soothe them?
• …is baby too hot? Too cold? Too quiet? Too loud?
• …can I breast feed comfortably here?
• …can I sit here until baby has settled?
• …what if baby’s reflux kicks in overdrive? What will I do?

I’ve created a number of scenarios over the last 4 months to keep me home bound. After all, it’s where I feel safest. Everything I need is there and it’s familiar for me and baby. But it’s also where I feel the most lonely and isolated from everyone and everything.

This brings me to The MummyShip. My first real trip outside with baby (and daddy) was to the mall. But before we got to that point I had searched almost every version of ‘baby friendly places in London’ in preparation. The MummyShip is not just about making note of places that have a baby change, ramp or lift access, clean facilities etc. But everything else that can put you at ease when venturing outside of the home.

• …is the bathroom large enough to take a buggy inside?
• …does the baby change tray hover over the toilet seat?
• …is there somewhere to warm or cool baby’s bottle?
• …are the tables/chairs moveable/lightweight/comfy etc.

Feel free to follow my journey as I aim to become more confident and comfortable being outdoors with my baby and keeping a record of places that permit me to do so!

Captain Mummy